Returning to India: A Woman's Culture Shock After US Life

After spending over a decade in the United States, an Indian woman made the decision to relocate back to her homeland with her family. While she expresses that her new life in Hyderabad has allowed her to reconnect with family members, there are still several aspects of her previous life in the US that she finds herself missing. In a candid discussion featured on the Instagram page DeshWaapsi, which highlights the experiences of Indians returning from abroad, she shared her thoughts on adjusting to life in India, the surprises her children encountered, and the advice she would offer to other Non-Resident Indians (NRIs) contemplating a similar transition. Although the video has since been removed, her insights remain relevant for many.

The woman recounted her time in Cupertino, California, where she lived for 11 years, while her husband spent 16 years in the US. The couple, who are parents to a seven-year-old and a two-year-old, made the choice to return to India primarily to be nearer to their family. They selected Hyderabad as their new home because many of their relatives reside there, with the woman stating, “My in-laws are here.” When reflecting on what she misses most about her life in the US, she highlighted the friendliness of strangers. “People are so kind there,” she remarked, noting that it was common for individuals to exchange smiles and greetings as they passed one another. She humorously contrasted this with her experiences in India, where she felt that “no one cares.” Her son, adapting to this cultural shift, often asked, “Mummy, why is she not saying hi to me?”

Despite the nostalgia for her previous life and the friendships she left behind, she acknowledged that returning to India has also provided her with invaluable experiences, particularly the opportunity to spend more time with her parents. However, she also addressed a significant challenge that families should consider before making a similar move: the process of finding the right educational institution for their children. She advised parents to avoid hastily placing their children in higher grades without ensuring they are adequately prepared. Sharing her own story, she explained that her eldest daughter had completed kindergarten in the US before their relocation. Upon approaching a school in India, they were surprised to find that the institution was willing to admit her daughter directly into the second grade without conducting any assessment. “Here they were like, ‘It’s okay, she can put it in the second grade,’” she recalled. This decision ultimately posed difficulties for her daughter, who struggled to adapt to the new academic environment. The family later recognized that the decision to skip a grade was detrimental to her education. “Frustrated, they pushed us. But now I realize, ‘No, it’s not good for her,’ and I put her back in second grade,” she explained. She urged parents returning from abroad to thoroughly research school admissions and not solely depend on online resources. “Choosing a school is very, very hard,” she emphasized, cautioning against relying on “video calls and reviews and feedback” while still residing in the US, as this may not provide a complete understanding of how schools operate in India.